


A secret in the dark

by thetroublewellgetinto



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bottom Dean, College AU, Destiel - Freeform, M/M, Masturbation, NSFW, Top Castiel, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester, Topping from the Bottom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-09
Updated: 2015-11-09
Packaged: 2018-04-30 17:36:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5173118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thetroublewellgetinto/pseuds/thetroublewellgetinto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean has had enough of having a roommate and being unable to bring anyone home to satisfy the need in him. And maybe it isn't just because he has a roommate, maybe it's also because said roommate affects Dean a lot more than he knows what to do with.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A secret in the dark

Dean suppressed a groan as he rolled onto his back, throwing an arm over his eyes in the dark and pushing down his thoughts. Having a roommate really blew, especially on nights like this, when he longed for sensation, when hands ghosted over him in his thoughts and a hot and heavy need ached in him from the base of his spine.

But his roommate slept not ten feet away in his own bed across the small dorm room, Dean could just hear him breathing. He could hardly sate himself of this with someone sleeping peacefully across the room. Dean would have found some girl to go home with, to give him that release he was so starved for, but school was taking more out of him than he expected, and he continuously fell into bed at the end of the day without the energy to go anywhere. But he wasn’t quite tired enough to fall asleep, and instead was kept awake with the desire, with thoughts of hands and lips and blue eyes and messy hair…

No, he couldn’t let himself think about that. He couldn’t let himself go there, even in his head. Cas was… Cas was his roommate, a quirky, sweet guy, majoring in English. And from the moment he had walked into their dorm room for the first time, Dean couldn’t get him out of his head.

Dean curled up a little tighter in his bed, back to Cas, hand on his stomach. It seemed that the more he tried to not think about it all, the more he couldn’t keep himself from thinking about it. He could feel himself, mostly hard in his boxers, and swallowed thickly. He hadn’t given in yet this school year, it had been weeks and weeks and it had only gotten harder (pun not intended) to resist.

He couldn’t take it anymore. Cas had been asleep for hours, he wouldn’t know. But Dean would have to be quiet. He shifted just enough to let his hand stray down, to brush at the tip through the thin material, and had to bite his lip to stay quiet. Slowly, he slid his hand underneath the waistband and let out as soft a sigh as he could manage as his fingers closed around his cock, hand cool against the hot flesh. He stayed there a moment, gathering himself, drinking in the feeling of being touched after so long, and then tentatively started to move his hand, biting back the noises he wanted to make. And if in the back of his mind, there were thoughts of blue eyes and perfect lips and long fingers and strong thighs, no one had to know.

His leg muscles trembled a little as he ran his fingers over the head, letting the liquid budding there wet his fingers and make his hand’s path smoother. Dean’s breath shuddered as he got closer, but he had to move so slowly to keep his hand from making noise, and it was agonizing. But when he finally tipped over the edge, warm come wetting his leg, it was one of the best orgasms he’d had, and he felt his bones turn to jelly as he melted into his bed, stroking himself lazily as he finished.

He wanted to go to sleep right then, but dragged himself to the bathroom to clean up and change boxers. He leaned against the counter and sighed heavily. There was a [art of him that reproached him for what he’d done. But he couldn’t find it in himself to really regret it. Especially with how well he slept afterwards.

 

 

He managed to talk himself out of it for about a week’s worth of nights afterwards, but then he broke again. Once more in the darkness his breathing grew shallow and rapid, desperately quieted as much as possible, and his hand slowly and carefully pulled an orgasm from him, the tiniest of moans falling from his lips, and a sliver more of shame lodging in his gut.

 

 

It kept happening, his resolve and self-control dissolving into almost nothing, both about touching himself while Cas slept, and about letting thoughts of Cas into his head as he did it. What made it worse was how well the two of them got along. Dean really liked Cas, even just as a friend, and the lie of it, the place Cas occupied in his thoughts at night, it ate at him a little more every day.

But it wasn’t like he could tell Cas, about any of it. He didn’t have any reason to think Cas was into him or ever would be, let alone into guys at all. Cas didn’t seem to care much about all of that. Dean wasn’t sure he had seen Cas go around with anyone at all. Then again, Dean hadn’t either. But that was for a different reason. The reason he was starting to grudgingly admit to himself, a reason called his huge crush on his roommate. That had started the moment the other boy walked in the door. ( _Their door,_ Dean’s mind told him. Dean told his mind to fuck off.)

He knew he was just digging himself into a pit here. Even if Cas never found out—and Dean had a perpetual fear that he would somehow—he really needed to get himself out of this, to find someone he had a chance with and go home with them, cause he was setting himself up for heartbreak here and it was only getting worse. He continued to live in the fantasy world though, denying all the warnings he was giving himself. Cause maybe if he pretended that this little bubble of secret pleasure wouldn’t pop, then it couldn’t.

 

 

It was the end of another long week, Friday night, and Dean climbed into his bed after finishing up some homework. Cas had gotten in bed about an hour earlier and sat reading. He glanced over as Dean got into his bed, and then leaned forward to turn off the light. They had a sort of unspoken arrangement. Since Cas’s bed was right next to the light switch, if Dean went to bed first, Cas turned it off when he was ready, and if Dean went to bed first, Cas read and then turned it off when Dean got in bed. It had a dangerous amount of domesticity to it that Dean tried his hardest to ignore but never really could. There was such an easy connection between the two of them, it hurt sometimes, especially with the secrets he’d been keeping.

He stared up at the ceiling for a while, listening to Cas’s breaths and waiting for him to fall asleep. Cas’s breathing was slow and almost comforting to listen to, and Dean hated himself for thinking like that. But whatever he wanted to think, he still fell asleep like this some nights, without the need to try anything for himself, just listening to the breathing from across the room slow and settle into sleep.

But tonight was not one of those nights. Before he could catch them, Dean’s thoughts strayed. His eyes fell closed as scenes played out in his mind, and he breathed in deeply, trying to calm himself some, almost able to feel how Cas’s hands raked down his sides in his head.

He rolled on his side away from Cas before a tent in the sheets could become evident. Over the rush of blood in his ears, he listened across the room for Cas’s breathing, trying to tell if his roommate had fallen asleep yet or not. His breathing was even, and Dean was pretty sure he was asleep. Which was good, because he was achingly hard and couldn’t have held off from it much longer.

He pulled his boxers down this time, letting his hard cock out into the cool air, shivering a little at the feeling of having it free. He wrapped his hand around the base, squeezing tightly, and pulled a little, causing himself to curl in tighter, holding in a gasp. He kept going though, retreating into his head and playing out his fantasies as his hand slowly worked on him.

Before he could stop himself, he heard himself say Cas’s name, and he froze. It had been quiet, but distinct and audible, and every alarm was going off in his head.

He could still hear Cas breathing, but in his panic he was unsure whether or not it was sleeping breathing or not. When he heard blankets rustle and Cas moving, he barely dared breath. If he had been the praying sort, he would have prayed that Cas was just getting up to use the bathroom.

He didn’t dare move a muscle, though he forced himself to breath. He laid with his back to the rest of the room, hand still wrapped around his still hard cock, waiting and listening.

Cas’s footsteps lightly approached Dean’s bed, and he paused.

“Dean,” Cas said softly, and Dean was sure he was in deep shit. He didn’t move, hoping to pass himself off as asleep.

Cas took the last step or so to Dean’s bed, and whispered, “I know you’re not asleep Dean, I heard you say my name, I know what you were doing.” Silence hung in the air. “Actually I know what you’ve been doing for quite a while. But you said my name this time, and I can’t let it go on.”

Dean jumped a little as he felt hand on his side, and Cas continued to whisper, right in his ear. “Not like this at least.” His hand slid around Dean more, and his fingers brushed against the very base of Dean’s cock. “Not without me helping. That is unless you have any objections?”

Dean spoke for the first time, his voice rough. “Not at all,” he managed to say, and shivered immensely as Cas mouthed behind his ear.

“Good,” Cas whispered, and Dean felt him climb up into the small raised bed behind him. Cas slid one arm underneath Dean’s side and pressed his chest against Dean’s back, mouth pressing against his shoulder, where it would likely leave a mark.

But Dean didn’t care about marks. He didn’t think he would care about anything Cas did to him right then. He was still in shock that this was happening at all, and was scared he’d wake up the next morning and find this had been a dream.

Cas’s hand gripped his wrist, though Dean’s hand had fallen away from his cock, which ached with desire and need, leaking a little at the tip. And nothing at all was helped by the fact that Dean could feel Cas’s own cock pressing against his ass, which of course the little shit was doing on purpose.

“Are you just going to tease me or are you going to help,” Dean croaked, and then immediately gasped as Cas’s hand let go of his wrist and slid down around Dean’s cock. Dean arched back into Cas, and he could feel a smirk being pressed under his jaw, where Cas’s mouth had wandered.

Cas’s fingers felt even better than Dean had imagined them. They were long and cool and sure, and made no effort to be quiet as they stroked Dean’s cock. His hand moved quickly, more than Dean had been able to do for himself in these last few months.

Cas’s other hand was pulled across Dean’s chest from where it laid under him, pulling Dean closer to Cas’s front. Cas started to move his hips a little behind Dean, causing his cock to push harder against the thin material of the back of Dean’s boxers. It was driving Dean wild, and he wasn’t sure how he had ever been at all satisfied by doing this on his own. Nothing could compare.

“Cas, I think I’m gonna…” but before Dean could finish his sentence or start his orgasm that was about to come, Cas’s hand disappeared from his cock, leaving it aching almost too much to bear.

“Cas, what-”

“Not yet,” came the deep voice behind him, and he felt Cas pull away from his back some, leaving it feeling cold and empty. But then Cas sat up and Dean found himself pulled onto his back, boxers still scrunched around his hips and cock up in the cold air. Cas climbed over him, knees on either side of Dean’s hips and hands on Dean’s shoulders, pressing him into the mattress.

Dean looked up at him, gaining some more confidence in the reality of all this, and smiled a little. “You are wearing entirely too many clothes.”

Cas let out a small laugh, and leaned back from Dean, letting himself sit on Dean’s knees. “I agree.” He began to tug at the bottom of his shirt, and Dean pushed himself into a sitting position so he could reach and help, cock pushed between the two of them, still hard and heavy, only twitching more as they kept going.

Cas’s shirt came off, Dean’s following seconds later. Dean caught Cas’s lips in a kiss, one that started soft and developed into something searing, and Dean was pushed back onto his back. Cas’s cock was as hard as his, but still clothed in Cas’s sweatpants, and was rubbing roughly against Dean’s own.

Dean’s hands slid down Cas’s sides as they kissed, and found their way under the waistband of Cas’s pants, tugging on them a little to get permission. With the way Cas breathed “yes” into his mouth and lifted up his hips to help, Dean was pretty sure there would have been more issue if he didn’t try to take Cas’s pants off.

They slid off his hips easily, and Cas pulled away momentarily to kick them to the side. He hovered over Dean then, the same as he had before, with his hands on Dean’s shoulders. Dean couldn’t help but glance down, where Cas’s cock hung large and heavy underneath him, not far from where Dean’s own was, hard and red and leaking.

Dean let his hands drift up to grasp at Cas’s hips, and he returned his gaze to Cas’s face, letting his thumbs circle around Cas’s prominent hip bones. “You’re gorgeous,” Dean told him, watching the way that the moonlight from the cracks in the blinds on the window played on Cas’s face.

“Are you talking about me or my cock,” Cas asked, sounding amused.

“All of you,” Dean answered with conviction, flushing a little as Cas smiled.

“You stole the words right from my mouth,” Cas told him, kissing Dean again, and settling down with a groan so that their cocks lay next to each other. Dean brought one of his knees up, wrapping it around Cas a little, pulling Cas closer with every piece of him that he could, quieting the moan he wanted to let out as Cas responded eagerly, pushing his body against Dean’s, every possible piece of skin touching. The sweat between them helped their bodies move against each other, shifting and rocking.

“Dean,” Cas said between kisses and breaths, “I want to fuck you.”

The words sent a spike of something through Dean, and he was surprised he didn’t come right then and there. “Please,” he was pretty sure he said, but Cas must have gotten the message at least because he pulled back enough to lift Dean’s legs.

But he paused. “Do you have…?”

Dean blinked up at him for a moment, before realizing what he was saying. “Oh right, um yeah. My wallet is on the desk…”

Cas climbed off of him quickly to retrieve it. “You keep this stuff in your wallet? Cocky, Winchester.”

Dean grinned at him and shrugged some, watching Cas open up the condom and roll it down to the base of his cock, then open up the little portable packet of lube.

“Let me do that part,” Dean offered, as he still laid sprawled out on the bed, hands itching to touch and to hold.

Cas said nothing in answer, but instead set the packet in Dean’s hands and climbed up and over Dean, coming to lay on his back beside him. Dean raised his eyebrows at Cas, who just winked. Dean got the message, and brought himself up to sit on Cas’s thighs, putting some of the lube on his hand and handing the rest back to Cas.

Dean slowly spread the cool lube over Cas’s cock, loving every little shiver and moan he got from Cas in the process, and prolonging it perhaps just a little bit, for the sake of those things. He felt Cas’s hand edge around his ass, and leaned forward to give him access, unable to hold his noises back as Cas began to prepare him, long fingers working agilely to loosen up his hole.

Before long, Cas’s hands tugged at Dean’s hips, guiding him into position and helping him settle down onto his cock. Dean and Cas let out simultaneous shuddering breaths, and both sat there for a few moments, taking in the sensation. Then Dean began to move, and Cas did too, falling into a rhythm of breathing and hip thrusts and kisses, mouths and hands everywhere they could be.

Dean held on as long as he could, but he had been waiting for so long that night to come, and all it took was a few strokes from Cas’s hand on his cock as Cas moved inside of him to pull Dean over the edge. He came hard and fast over Cas’s chest, his movements stuttering and his breath hitching. Cas followed moments later, tensing up and slowly sliding into boneless release, mouth pressed to Dean’s in a kiss the entire time.

After a few moments, Cas pushed on Dean’s chest a little, and Dean rolled off of him, watching a little forlornly as Cas slid out of the bed and walked to the bathroom. He closed his eyes as he listened to the water run as Cas cleaned up. Dean shivered against the cold that now surrounded his body, and tried to fight off the empty feeling growing in his chest. He wasn’t sure what to expect now, but he felt spent and empty and Cas had gotten out of bed as soon as possible. He heard the water shut off and bit his lip a little, squeezing his eyes shut tighter. The bathroom door opened and Dean waited to hear the sounds of Cas climbing back into his own bed.

But instead, there were a few quick footsteps, and then a warm and now familiar body pressed into his side, and the blanket was pulled over them both.

“Cas?”

“Hm?” Dean tried not to let the way that Cas’s voice vibrated between them both distract him.

“Are you gonna stay?”

Cas pushed up, to look Dean in the eye, a small flicker of worry in his expression. “For as long as you want me too.”

Dean smiled and pulled Cas back down, closer than before, and Cas settled against his side, half on top of Dean, face pressed into his shoulder and hair tickling Dean’s cheek.

He knew it was too early to say it, but in Dean’s head, he felt somehow sure that he would always want Cas to stay. And so he closed his eyes and let himself relax, let himself melt into Cas, and fell asleep.

 

 

He woke up warmer than normal. Also sorer. And more squished. But the familiar sound of breath in Dean’s ear reminded him. He didn’t even have to open his eyes to remember that Cas was the one laying on him, making him rather sweaty and having a hard time breathing, but happier than he had ever woken up in… probably ever.

Dean let his eyes slide open and was met with an endearing view of a mess of dark hair. Cas seemed to still be asleep, and every once and a while he let out a soft sound that Dean felt rumble just a little bit between their chests pressed together. He could hardly believe any of it. Cas, the sex, but most of all the way he had stayed.

He brought a hand up to carefully run through Cas’s hair. He felt Cas stirring as he did so, and Cas lifted his head a little to lean into Dean’s hand.

“Hmmm, good morning,” Cas said groggily, his voice think and deep with sleep. He shifted a little and turned his head, so that his chin rested on Dean’s chest, looking at him. Dean looked back, lifting his head some to meet Cas’s smile.

“Morning Cas,” Dean said quietly, smiling more at the words.

Cas pushed himself forward a few inches, so that he could reach Dean’s lips.

They kissed long but soft, and it was a little bit of heaven. Dean wasn’t sure it could get a whole lot better than this.

Actually on second thought, Dean thought to himself as Cas’s kisses moved lower and lower, and his hands grasped at Dean’s hips, it could get better.

 


End file.
